Felicity Cloake is probably my favourite food columnist, and one of the food writers I’m currently enjoying most overall. Gastro-bookworm synthesist probably isn’t a broad demographic, but I’m in it and she hits it square on. Her ham croquetas recipe is no exception, and making it a couple of times taught me a worrying lesson: croquetas are easy enough to make that you can have them as snack/comfort food.
After all, a white sauce just doesn’t take that long, and you can cool it pretty fast by sticking the pan in a cold water bath. So yeah, you can bring croquetas in well under a hour and most of that will be waiting. This is bad – now I basically want them all the time.
It’s doubly bad if you’re, say, spending a month vegetarian out of perverse curiosity and cooking dinner for your lactose-intolerant boyfriend. Given croquetas are mostly milk and the body of the flavour is ham, that probably doesn’t fly. But I gave it a go anyway.
My boyfriend is lactose intolerant. You can probably imagine that this occasionally makes cooking tricky. I’m not a big fan of food substitutes and fakes – “tofurkey” and mycoprotein dressed as lamb can go hang. Soy milk just doesn’t taste right to me, and the texture always seems off when I cook with it.
Fortunately, there’s lactofree products. This is regular cow’s milk, passed over what I assume will be lactase to remove and break down the lactose, rendering it largely safe. It works, and there’s minimal impact on the taste. Their faux cheddar tastes a bit rubbery and bland, mind, but I can’t fault the milk, cream, or cream cheese.
More importantly, this let me service a quiche craving and win moderate boyfriend points.
It was a cobbled-together and very much from-memory recipe, but here it is. This isn’t quite dairy-free, but for the intolerant rather than the outright allergic, it’s probably fine. That said, I accept no responsibility, please don’t sue me, and so on, and so forth.